Protected: “Entertainment” – Introspective

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ihappy: 17 degrees. Spread the Happy. Mobility Game.

“Happiness is not a destination. It is a method of life.” -Burton Hills

I recently found myself in a truly tragic dilemma.  I was the owner of not one – but TWO ipods! oh me oh my oh woe.  So I thought to myself, “myself, two must become one,” and I set out making it so. 

I decided to sell my ipod, but, almost simultaneously, I decided to give away any money I received.  Now, mind you, I am not inordinately rich, I honestly could’ve used the money… but what’s money?  I needed hope more.  I was tired of complaining about all the wrong things in the world, I was tired of bitching and whining and moaning… I wanted my life to be more about “the doing” than “the saying.”  I needed to believe that people could still be good, and it had to start with myself.

So I sold my ipod for $160 and decided to share what I earned with 16 strangers ($10 each).  But I wanted to do more than just give, I wanted to share the spirit of giving….. and I wanted a glimpse into these peoples lives… I am always fascinated by how beautiful people are whenever I get the chance to talk to them individually (not so much in groups, haha).  So, starting with myself, I asked each of these people to do 4 things for me:

1. Name something, anything, that they loved (the idea for this question was mercilessly ripped from someone else’s bleeding literal heart, or rather, mind. I claim no ownership.).
2. Play a group game called “Eat Poop you Cat.” Basically, the first person, me, writes down a phrase, then passes it to the next person.  That person draws a picture based on said phrase. They then pass the drawing on to the next person, and that person writes a phrase based on the drawing (without any knowledge of the original phrase), and so on until the game ends. 
3. Name the first song that comes their mind (you can find a playlist of all these songs to the right [in the sidebar] under a heading “sharing is caring.” You may download these or listen to them here. [perhaps as you look through the pictures? ])
4. Choose someone else to give $10 to.

I’m really happy I did this.  There’s really nothing more to say, I’m just glad. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

Ericsson San Pablo Chu

1. Love. Giving. You.
2. I am not young enough to know everything.
3. Woman – John Lennon

Robert Gagnon

1. My 3 Children: Kyla Dawn Gagnon, Dion Lionel John Gagnon, Rebecca May Gagnon
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. I’ve Got Friends in Low Places – Garth Brooks

Robert was the first person I met willing to do any of the things I asked. I think most of the people I asked prior (mind you, I was only asking a certain ‘type’ of person… someone I thought needed the money) were weary of finding someone else to give $10 to.  Interesting – I faced a similar dilemma earlier in the process…when I was first trying to sell the ipod.  My original idea had the buyer picking the first person, but no one responded to my ipod ads for a good cause (I even put up posters).  So I just sold it regularly and picked the first person, Robert, myself.

Anyway, before I met Robert, to be honest, I was on the verge of giving up.  I got off the skytrain at Stadium, depressed that no one was willing to take a moment out of their lives to do a good thing.   I have no idea why I got off the skytrain, I didn’t have to go anywhere near Stadium, I was sitting there, and I was just like, don’t give up, get off, maybe something will happen.  So I got off. 

I was walking down the sidewalk, moping, and I saw Robert walking the other way, he had his cap out, I wasn’t sure if he was asking for money or not.  haha, so I followed him.  After a minute, I saw him ask someone for change, so I marked him.  He looked back at me at that instance, and, I feel, was kind of freaked out, because, obviously, I was following him.  I am not a good detective.  So I caught up with him, and told him everything, and he agreed readily to play along.  I was so depressed when I first talked to him…I was scared to ask him to find someone else to give $10 to.  I was resigned that maybe I should just ask people to answer some questions and draw stuff.  But our conversation led to me suggesting it (finding someone else to give $10 to), and he did so gladly.  Thanks Robert! 

What I most remember about Robert: Robert loves Bruce Lee movies.

Juniper (A.C. Abbott)

1. Animals, the sun, love
2. Swings in the spring, on grass so green
3. The Walk – The Cure

Juniper was probably the nicest, sweetest person I had a chance to talk with.  She was just so full of life and happy go lucky, so willing to talk and inquisitive.  haha, when I first talked to her, I was still scared that she wouldn’t agree to help me find another person to give $10 to, so I didn’t mention it (thinking Robert was one of kind). But she asked me questions, and our conversation eventually revealed my hope, and she did so with vigor.  She was running around chasing people!

What I most remember about Juniper: her hippiness and her french fries.

Bo Buckland

1. My Wife, Christa
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Stairway to Heaven – Led Zeppelin

Bo was the guy Juniper chased down.  He was a pretty willing, fun guy, he reminded me of some kind of Grandpa. He told me a funny story about how every day of his life he has managed to find a 10 cent coin.  What can I say? Fuck yeah. 

What I most remember about Bo: his red cart.

Christa Buckland

1. My son, Rocky
2. Swing set in spring.
3.  a Horse (Ride a Cowboy) – Big and Rich

Christa is Bo’s wife, Bo led me to some kind of apartment building, and I waited downstairs for them.  Around this time Robert found me, and told me excitedly that he had found another person.  I said, okay, he said he’d go get her and galloped off.  Bo came back down with Christa, we talked for awhile, then some lady came down from the apartment and told us to to get away from the entrance or else she would “spray” us.  She doesn’t see me initially (I was behind the door), but Christa’s just like, “I’m doing a survey!” and gets kind of pissed off, I say lets just move over a bit, and everything’s okay.  Christa’s nice and all, but a bit out of it, I think she is on drugs, or on the tail end of some kind of hit.  But I tell her to smile, and our conversation is nice.  She introduces me to her friend Ralph…

What I most remember about Christa: huge range of emotions.

Ralph Edward Clarke

1. My family
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Rock & Roll – Led Zeppelin

Ralph, like most of the guys from here on in, was pretty quiet and reserved. As I talk to Ralph, I overhear Christa and Bro discussing pooling their money and doing something after. I am not exactly sure what, but am slightly saddened that perhaps I am fueling some drug deal.  But I figure that somewhere down the line, my $10 will go to them buying a bed or food, and let it be. 

What I most remember about Ralph: his eyes. They were very, just, quietly aware.

Vi Cardinal

1. Self
2. Stick-Man (Definition)
3. Heaven and Hell – Black Sabbath

Vi was very sweet, and smiled a lot, she was very cordial and pleasant to talk to.  She reminded me of Juniper except a bit older, and a little more reserved.

What I most remember about Vi: her laughing to herself as she wrote down, “Self,” and later, “Stick-man (Definition)”

Mick

1. Music
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Purple Haze – Led Zeppelin

Mick had a lot of one liners, but was generally straightforward to talk to.  He was always just kind of chuckling to himself almost self-deprecatingly. He gave me some jewelry he found on the street! I think its fake, but my friends a jeweler, so I will ask her… I’m hoping its worth something! If it is, I will give everything away again! haha.

What I most remember about Mick: I could never really see his eyes.

Sarah

1. My Jonnie
2. Go where your celebrated, not tolerated. I’d rather be hated 4 who I am then loved 4 who I am not.
3. Sail Away – David Gray

Sarah was pretty nice.  Later, while I was talking to her referral, Jonnie, she took it upon herself to explain what and why I was doing what I was doing with passerby’s.  She also wrote the most interesting, I think, phrase from a drawing.

What I most remember about Sarah: high energy.

Jonnie

1. Hangin’ out with my girl.
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Changes – 2pac

Jonnie was pretty much quiet, and answered my questions in a straightforward fashion.

What I most remember about Jonnie: his smirk.

Robby

1. Family & girlfriend
2. Be nice to have one!
3. Us And Them – Pink Floyd

Robby reminded me of Kenny from South Park, haha. He had a self deprecating humor around him.

What I most remember about Robert: again, I could never really see his eyes.

Wes

1. My Girls, Hayly & Sharef, & Trees
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Just Another Day in Paradise – Phil Vassar

Wes had a confident manner around him, pretty decent guy to talk to.  haha, it was embarrassing talking to him, because his initial answer to my question, “what do you love” was just girls and trees.  After writing that, he went down to add the word, “my” in front of “girls.” As he writes down the first letter m, I guess, “money?” and he’s like, no money sucks, and then emphasizes “MY girls” as he writes down the word, “my.” I’m like oh, not “all girls?” Then he’s like my daughters, and writes down their names, and I’m like oh, and remember why I am not good at being conventionally funny… or maybe any kind of funny at all.

What I most remember about Wes: he said he didn’t care about money.

Robert

1. Money
2. Sunshine on my shoulders makes me happy
3. Crystal Ball – Styx

Robert was one of the more talkative, curious guys. He was fun to talk to.  He seemed to have a lot of life, I wish I could’ve talked to him more, but at this point, I was getting a bit tired.

What I most remember about Robert: He told me about he used to run a business in the Philippines.

Roy

1. Money
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Yes

Quiet and to the point. He was only in it for the money, I am sure.

What I most remember about Roy: He wouldn’t name a specific song!!

Robbie

1. Drama
2. More Money More Problems
3. We Fly High – Jim Jones

Robbie was pretty high energy and exuberant.  He was one of those hip hop types, he was interesting to talk to I guess.

What I most remember about Robbie: he was the cleanest person I talked to.

Cheryl Strongarm

1. My 4 children: Alysia, Ashley, Aaron & Arlen
2. See picture above (I will post scanned higher res versions of each page later).
3. Should I Stay or Should I Go – The Clash (I’m hoping this is the song she meant).

Cheryl was the friend Robert, the first guy I met, went to go find.  She was real nice and patient, apparently she had been waiting for awhile. I saw her again as I passed through Tinseltown. She smiled. I think she got something to eat.

What I most remember about Cheryl: She can’t draw Earth. haha.

Gary J. Flickinger II

1. My deceased grandparents, Agatha & Charles
2. Dying
3. What a Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong

Wes reminded me of the actor Norm Macdonald, except less sarcastic/comedic…. although he was still both. He seemed pretty intelligent (bookwise). It is also incredible that he chose the song, “Its a Wonderful World” to end with, being that he was the unknowing last person.  I wish I had talked to him more… I seemed to talk less and less with people the further I got, maybe I was getting tired.  But, in the end, on the way home, remembering things I had talked about with these people, I was content… more than content, joyous.  Its always amazing, thinking about how every single person you pass on the street, every single one has a life, a history as passionate, as true, and as real as yours.  Its magical, really.  Their are so many people, so many lives… I am lucky to have been a part of these ones.

What I most remember about Gary: I saw him again as I passed through Tinseltown, he stopped me and said thank you again.

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” -Aesop

 

Ogapeskather! Ahoy! 1. Register as an organ donor….

….Why not?  God forbid I die anytime soon, I’m super stoked to grow old, but just in case  (knock on wood), I registered as an organ donor!  Its pretty easy, just go to this site (if you live in BC): http://transplant.bc.ca/index.asp# and follow the links, fill out the info, voila! One day you may in fact directly save a life! It literally takes less than a minute.

I have also, starting today, resolved to become a vegetarian… or at least, peskatarian.  I always feel gross eating meat anyway.  Whenever I go to the market and see amputated parts everywhere its so disgusting… sometimes they look so… human.  And factory farming? Don’t even get me started.  Why I waited this long is beyond me. 

And I’m a Godfather now!  That’s insane!  I would never associate me with Father…. God, maybe.  Anyhow, even though she says nothing, and does nothing, and rarely even moves, my Goddaughter rocks ass.  I am going to get that tatooed on to her, “rocks ass.” Its a birthmark!

Moving between the legs of tables and of chairs, rising or falling, grasping at kisses and toys, advancing boldly, sudden to take alarm, retreating to the corner of arm and knee, eager to be reassured, taking pleasure in the fragrant brilliance of the Christmas tree. -T. S. Eliot            

Oh, and here are some things I am looking into volunteering for.  If anyone knows of anything else, please do email me.

• Food bank @ East Van http://cityreach.org/home.html - self explanatory.
• Kidstart mentoring program – helping children who are experiencing difficulties in their lives www.kidstart.ca  
• Red Cross http://www.redcross.ca/article.asp?id=014574&tid=078 
• making friends with a 13 year old autistic girl in North Van (someone just forwarded me this).
• SHARE Crisis Line http://www.sharesociety.ca/volunteerism.htm

As well, this summer I was planning to travel a bit, but for certain other reasons those initial plans are now moot.  I am still looking to travel though!  But now I am excited at the prospect of volunteering and traveling instead.  If anyone knows of anything going on that you think I may be interested in, or are doing something themselves and wouldn’t mind an extra body, please do tell!  Right now I’m just checking out sites like http://www.cadip.org/ and asking around.  I’m looking to do it in May or whenever school ends.      

ipod update: its funny, absolutely no one contacted me about my ipod.  That is, no one contacted me about my ipod for a good cause.  I posted more ads simply just selling the ipod, and within literally an hour, I’ve gotten 20 replies…. though that may be just because my first ad was unclear, in fact, most probably so (I was in a rush). Oh well, I’ll try posting some more articulate ads, but it looks like I’m just going to have to sell it and pick the first person myself (rather than the buyer doing it).  

Here are some games I am looking at maybe getting them to play. It might be neat if I could document the whole thing on video.

• consequences - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Consequences
• charades - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charades
• eat poop you cat - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eat_Poop_You_Cat

Urinal.

The artist himself may not think he is religious, but if he is sincere his sincerity in itself is religion. - Emily Carr

It interests me that throughout history where religion has been, art also has always necessarily followed (whether it be Russian propaganda films, Byzantine icons, or the Sistine Chapel).  I am not a religious person, in the sense that I do not subscribe to any one conventional “religious” system, but strangely, I would still consider myself “religious.”  That is, I have strong beliefs… even if I am not always fully aware of them; I have conviction, even if I am not always sure how to act.  Emily Carr wrote that “the artist himself may not think he is religious, but if he is sincere his sincerity in itself is religion,” and I relate strongly to that.  Religion is not in a word or a symbol, a painting or a speech, it lives always in one’s own beliefs.

What concerned me most while working on this piece was that very question of belief.  I am at a point in my life where conviction seems a tricky, fickle thing – but an absolutely necessary thing nonetheless.

Just recently, during a media history screening, a film called “Armageddon” was shown.  I found it strange how so many people left, and of the few who did remain, many of them did so only to laugh derogatively at the movie.  I can understand this, I too felt an almost instant sense of…. superiority.  But why?  When judgment comes so easy, it is usually a sign that ignorance is near.  If it is wrong for a “common” person to quickly pass something off as “artsy,” how is it right to pass of another as “commercial?”  Perhaps it is a question of semantics, perhaps not, but I honestly feel that their is worth to be had, knowledge to be learned, in everything, regardless of intent.  An open mind is acceptance, it is strange that in an art school there seems to be so little of it.

“Bad art is always more tragically beautiful than good art because it documents human failure.”

I understand that the backlash is against certain conventions, and blind, ideologically irresponsible decisions (made in the film)…. but, I think, what people fail to recognize is that very reaction is itself convention.  We are spurred by a collective unity.  In this way, “art” is no less a mindless system of thought than, say, Religion or Commercialism, Consumerism or Communism (the “bad” kind).  Like these things, art too seems to have a system of almost taboo arbitrary codes; ways we should think, talk, look, act. What I strive to remember is that this collective identity of “art” has, in fact, absolutely nothing to do with art – Being an “artist” has always been after the fact.

There seems to be a misconceived notion that conviction, belief, and confidence require solidity and foundation… while they ARE a necessary foundation, they should not borrow the connotations of that word.  Belief should never be nailed to the ground, conviction never cemented, rather, they should be in constant negotiation.  Uncertainty is the Mother of all things beautiful and pure. Belief, conviction, confidence – these are things that should be founded on an ocean of constant change.  When judgment is passed without question, judgment should be brought to trial. 

In my piece, formalistically, all in all, there are 10 religions referenced (Christianity [Holy Cross], Judaism [Magden David], Sikhism [Sword, Dagger and Shield], Taoism [Tai-Chi, Yin-Yang], Buddhism [The Dhammachakka], Hinduism [OM], Islam [Crescent and Star], Indigenous Religions [The Quartered Circle], Confucianism [The Trigram], and Jainism [The Swastik Chakra], centered around an outline of Michel Duchamp’s, “Fountain.”  Below is an idea for where I would like to put it and how it would look (though I would be open to other suggestions.)  The only thing I am concerned about is whether the detail within the circle is too fine…. in which case I could take away one of the duplicates and enlarge it (though that would omit Toaism…)… I’ve attached the alternative as well.

 

A Blast From the Past

Well todays my Mom’s birthday, its a kind of sad day seeing as she’s not around anymore, but a fond one too.   

Anyway, I was looking through my stuff this morning, and I was shocked to find an old envelope stashed in a box labelled “Ericsson.” I opened it, and inside was a bunch of letters and a stash of photos.  Apparently my Mother had left me a time capsule, or maybe just meant to give me these things when I got older. 

 Reading the letter, and looking at the photos made me really happy.  The wierd thing is she had written the first letter before I was even born! And had written a letter to me every year until she passed away.  So, today I started writing my own letter … and it got me thinking… I wonder if one day my future children will come across this very blog?  Wouldn’t it be magical and strange?

 Anyway, I think its best if I keep it at that here, but I will share some of the pictures I found! Happy birthday, mama!

this picture cracks me up, I don’t know why.

 

Hello World!

just testing